Working with women, we see recurring patterns and themes around how women undervalue or undermine themselves, leaving money on the table and sabotaging their own growth and success.
The following are the 7 most common behaviors and beliefs that hold women back from more success, achievement, growth, and fulfillment:
1. No clear goals — Going with the flow.
Setting a goal is a powerful motivation to get up and put an effort into something. With no clear goals, a just go with the flow attitude would leave you unsatisfied and unclear about many aspects of your life. This also creates a standard in the way people work with you.
So clearly set goals for every aspect of your life.
2. Lack of ranking or categorizing your life
When it comes time to focus on one part of your life more than another, ranking or putting into categories is key. As women, it can get complex balancing being a woman, entrepreneur, mother, wife, Nigerian… (the list is endless) so to stay productive at any given time would require you to present. For instance, you may need to focus on preparing for a big meeting at work, yet you and your significant other had a fight this morning, so it’s harder than usual to ignore your phone and give your full attention to the task at hand. Even without a relationship issue, it may be difficult for you to focus on one thing at a time.
3. Always trying to please
Talk about working so hard to be all things perfect for and to everyone and fainting underneath the pressure of that demand. Know your priorities, and learn how to decline requests that don’t make the ranks. Don’t feel guilty to say No.
4. The attraction of the comfort zone
No doubt, the comfort zone is familiar but life begins after your comfort zone and the great part is you can do it fearlessly. Always remember that one of the biggest regrets in life is not the things we failed at but the things we never tried. Get uncomfortable with comfort.
5. Self Doubt
This is a big one because a lot of things happening in our lives can interfere with the way we view ourselves at different times but the trick to handle this is to always remember that even the most successful people have self-doubt at different times but are able to not let the feelings affect their reality.
Whether you feel confident or not, make a choice to show up and show up at your best.
6. The perfectionism trap
Is it perfect, am I ready enough, do I tick all the boxes? Are examples of perfection traps that have stopped many women from putting in that Job application or just pursuing an idea.
7. Waiting, waiting, waiting
Being offered a good opportunity, a man will grab it and go whether he has the skills required for the job or not because he figures he’ll work it out once he starts. Given the same opportunity, many women will pass if they don’t feel 100 percent ready.
Some concrete skills can be learned in a class or with practice; other, more intangible skills are often best learned on the job. No one knows how to do any job 100 percent when they start.